Our Relationship

Have you felt my pain
The remorseful time I have gone through
Or the immense regret I felt
When I couldn't find a way to express?

Have you seen when I groaned
By the words that you used
Or have u seen the gloom
I bore in my heart to hide the pain?

Have you considered the fear I have
Or thought about my worries?
Have you entered into my heart
OR seen the where and why I suffer?

Have u ever understood the confusion I have
And why I have that?
Have you ever wondered why I shout
Or why I want you to grow?


Oh Yes you have never thought of these
Cause you could never come out of yourself
You thought about only of urself
And never about me....


And there we have the misunderstanding
The unending debates of everyday
The doubt in our hearts
What would happen to the moments next
And to the relationship we have....

Mysterious She

She behaves most mysterious ways
I can't Understand

When I tell the truth
She feels I am lying


When I am kind
She feels I am acting

When I speak my heart out
She feels I am playing foul

When I feel to say I love her
She feels it to be the pretense

Whatever I do to make her please
Everything turns out to be a worse

What Shall I do?
I don't understand her mystery

My Sufferings Within

25th September,2009

There are times when I feel as if I am so lonely. I feel that there is none who cares for me, I feel even those who care for me , they care for just to get what they can get from me. Some want to get what a bit of things I have, Some just want to get what they can suck from my mind, some just want to give company just to get their own personal benefit. I feel I am just sucked out by these kind of people. I feel I don't get people of my type. I feel I am somehow different from others but I really donot understand what differs me from others. I don't like the unnecessary talks, I don't like to so called fun that generally young guys do. I don't like much of the association of the people. There are times I feel that none understands me.It is a big question to me whether I am having some problem or I am having a different perspective of life.

Sometime I am suffer within, I can't express to anyone. I can't express to my parents because they might take it to be a burden on them. I can't share it my siblings, they might not understand it the way I want them to understand. I can't share it to my girl friend, because it seems she has a different dimensions of feelings. She seems to ask for the fulfillment of her needs than feeling for me. I feel I am devoid of all things... I feel everywhere there is cry for asking things from me, I get nothing in return. I remain so empty and void.

My feeling gets worse sometime when I feel no need of existing at all. Sometime my dreams are getting weakened because I see no ray of light to reach there. I feel as If I am running like a horse without a destination. I feel I am nothing to this world. It matters nothing to others whether I live or not.


Ultimately I feel that everyone that I meet everyday asks for one or the other things from me. There are none that I could really meet who needs me to live for my happiness but all needs me to live for their happiness.


The World will use me just to get what it can get from me. But nothing will I gain that will satisfy my soul, my thirst for inner peace....God save my soul... And Keep me strong....


I wish not to wither before the time.... Keep me steady and Focus ...leaning unto you

Suffocation!

Suffocation

Feelings within heaves a sigh
None to understand
No one ever see
What troubles my heart?
What makes my heart to die!


Words unspoken remains within
None ever reads what gives me pain
None winks to see
Where I loose my goodness
Troubled with complexities of feelings.

Oh human emotions!
What a pity this life is
We speak lies
And say we what we feel not.

Where to find the freedom
For the words I can speak off
Where can I find the one
Who will take off a bit of burden?
Understanding my feelings
And listening to what I got to say?

Oh Miserable feelings?
Oh my life?
My desperate search
For someone to love me
More than I can ask for!

If Sometime your heart says
That likes the days of the past
I forget you and remember you not,
Make your heart to understand
That I haven't written your name on sand
But wrote it on my heart
And it cannot be wiped away.


If sometime you feel
That the world seems unfair
And you keep my name among them
Reconsider it again
And tell to your mind
That I am not with the world
But I have my own identity
And in my world u are precious.

No matter how far you go
No matter how rarely you talk to me
No matter how less time I spend with you
No matter what business keeps me busy
Remember that you are just like the burning candle
That’s burns within me always
And reminds me of your smiling face
And I can never forget you.

And remember that as the larks loves the rain
So I too love you for my deepest reason of Living
And you shall be within me forever.

My Thoughts1

No matter what, we are to struggle to survive; you need to struggle against all odds to live on this earth. These struggles are inevitable, nobody can avoid it. And as you struggle against all odds, I just want to tell you, don’t break down, and Keep on hoping and keep trusting in God as you make every preparation every morning to face the day. Thanks for being a wonderful friend. Wish you a happy and lovely weekend. Peace be with u

Within Me

In the yard of my heart
I planted many seeds
Nurtured them everyday
Few seeds sprouted
And took the space of my heart.

The sprouted few plants
Grows within me everyday
It makes my living better
They make me happy
And adds value to my life.

And as I ponder
And count the number of plants
I found yours one so strong
It is a plant with golden names on it.

And so you are shining in my heart
As the most beautiful one
And I shall keep on nurturing you
In all seasons and times.